A Letter to My Youngest Son

Dear T,

Although it may not seem like it right now, I love you more than I could ever possibly put into words.  I still remember the first time I held you in my arms after a very difficult pregnancy, you looked into my eyes and squeezed my finger and the rest is history.

Watching you grow up into the almost 18 year old you are now has been a joy.  You have such an outgoing personality, you are kind, caring and oh so funny.  I love that you have always looked out for the underdog, you have never cared about following the latest style, you,  for the most part, have marched to the beat of your own drum.  You are a leader amongst your peers and while it isn't always put to the best use now, it will take you far in life.


I only wish you would put as much zest and hard work into school as you do into everything else in life.  I know you think that your dad and I constantly nag you, yell, scream, argue and you're right, the past couple of school years, we have been doing exactly that. I'm definitely not proud of it, it definitely isn't a parenting skill I recommend  because it's obviously not even working!  I know you can't see it right now, but the reason we nag, yell, scream, argue is because we want you to be SUCCESSFUL in life.  We've told you and your brothers for years that you are creating the work habits during your high school years, that you will carry with you all your life, and let's be honest, even you have to admit your work habits where school is concerned aren't the greatest.  

All the emails and phone calls I get from your teachers?  Guess what, it's because they care about your future too and want you to succeed!.  Shocking I know right?  When they email or call to say you are behind or haven't handed in assignments, etc. they aren't doing it to rat you out, even though i'm sure it seems like it at the time.  

It feels like our house has turned into a battleground lately all over your school work, marks and lack of effort. This is an important time, you have an inbox full of college acceptances waiting for you to make important decisions with one click of your mouse!  And that click is worth thousands of dollars, part of which your dad and I have worked hard to save and part of which you have worked hard to save.  And it's thousands that need to be well spent because guess what?  Your college teachers won't be calling or emailing to say you are behind but they are willing to give you a chance to catch up because you're a great kid.   You don't have to decide right now what you want to do for the rest of your life but one thing is for sure, you need an education, you need to lay some groundwork, pour the foundation that you can build upon.  Without an education your future won't be as bright as it could be.

You follow me son?   All your dad and I want and expect from you is to do well in school and you know yourself you are such a smart guy!  All you have to do is pay attention in class, do your homework and actually hand in assignments!  Do some studying for your tests and voila!  You keep your marks up!  It isn't that hard because we all know what you are capable of when you put your mind to it.

I also get that it is sooooooo very hard to be a teenager these days, I have seen it first hand with your older brothers.  It's also so hard to know at 17 and 18 what you want to do with the rest of your life. It's hard to see how the decisions you make in high school and your work ethics will affect you later in life.  I get it!  I didn't know either, but it wasn't as hard to be a teenager back in the 80's as it is now.  Sure we had struggles but not like now.  It can also be hard to be a mom to a teenager these days, always wondering if you're doing the right thing.  

So today is the start of a new chapter in our lives.  No more yelling, nagging, screaming, arguing.  You are a big boy, we've obviously raised you right because you are a GREAT kid.  We've given you all the tools you need to set yourself up for success, now it's up to you to use them.  You need to succeed or fail on your own and we will always be here to help you along the way, all you have to do it ask.  

I have always told you and your brothers that life is all about the choices you make, how may times have you heard that over the years from me?  And this encompasses everything from the friends you keep, school work, in your job, in your community, relationships, every single aspect of your life.  Good or bad, the choices you make affect your life.  

This should be such an exciting time for you at school, choosing colleges, getting ready for graduation and prom and slowly moving into the next chapter of your life.  I want you to enjoy it, savour the days and the moments because they will be over in the blink of an eye.


Let me end this letter to you by reminding you that:

I'll love you forever

i'll like you for always

As long as you're living my baby you'll be

I love you,  I am proud of you, you are such an amazing guy and you have more great attributes then I can list on both hands.  Let's turn the page today and start a new chapter because even though it may not seem like it right now, the best is yet to come.



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